Monday, April 25, 2011

The Farting Preacher

Who says religion can't be funny? I smell heaven's bakery.

Monday, April 18, 2011

Last Supper: Rescheduled

Professor Colin Humphreys (University of Cambridge) believes he has strong evidence that Jesus' Last Supper actually took place on a Wednesday, not Thursday.

This changes everything. Now the spring-fertility-ritual turned Christian holiday could be celebrated on Saturday, and Good Friday will forever now just be Mediocre! No matter; unless the jelly beans and hollow chocolate bunnies stop coming, Easter will survive.

Lord Jesus, I know you find all the bickering amongst your peon subjects amusing, but rather than let us prattle on about ridiculous things like Biblical consistencies and universal truths, why don't you just fly down to Earth for a minute and set us all straight?

In all seriousness, the seriousness with which people treat this kind of crap is disturbing. If there were one God, and he were omnipotent and omniscient, and he cared about humans understanding his religious message correctly, he would have left things a bit more clear. Heck, he wouldn't have ever left! God would be real in our daily lives, all dissenting religions would disappear, and belief based on evidence would be a reality. But, as religious people believe, part of God's invisibility and and requirement of blind faith are character-building. You see, it would be all too easy for God to make himself has to be difficult and completely irrational and beyond our mere human understanding. God will reward all those who believe the contradicting religious messages and somehow guess the right one. God making sense (and being visible, demonstrable, consistent, etc.) is not part of his plan--a point which Christians love to make, as if that makes it all better.

It couldn't possibly be that all this is man-made hogwash, now could it?